Who is it harder for?
Neither one of us knows much about the lifestyle, I more than him. Neither one of us have ever been in a TTWD or D/s relationship. We are just learning as we go using the internet, books and blogland for guidance.
BTW.....thank you fellow bloggers......
There is 19 years of past practice. We have established roles in our relationship. One more dominant than the other.
So my question is.....who is it harder for?
The Dominant, who has never really been dominant. Who has always followed the lead, who has treated his wife like a queen and given her anything and everything. Who has allowed her to take the lead and is comfortable with the way things are/were. Who allows her to speak to him in any way, make most of the decisions, take care of the finances and the disciplining of the kids.
The submissive, who has never really been a submissive. Who has always taken the lead, made most of the family decisions, has taken care of the finances and has disciplined the kids. Who has spoken to him disrespectfully and has not always put him first.
So, how do they change? Can they change, can they have this D/s relationship? How do they reverse the roles without completely crumbling their foundation? How does he lead her confidently and with conviction? How does she give up control, when she's always been in control?
We definitely have the love! Looking forward to the rest of it!
I think its equal. Each has their own difficulties and challenges to deal with. One, no more than the other. If they each work on self discovery, make changes within and work together, anything is possible.