If you have been following my blog at all, especially the last few days then you know that I have a couple of issues that I am dealing with. One of the issues is not being able to cum just by fucking. I need clit stimulation to have an orgasm. That's the way it has always been. I think I have used a vibe for so long that it is a little desensitized. I don't know....I could be wrong.
Last night Mr. D wanted to try again. OK, who am I to argue. Of course I was a good little girl and went along. It was similar to the other night but way more intense. I was so overwhelmed by the end I was in tears. You know the tears I'm talking about. The tears that just start flowing, you're not really sure why. It's not because you're sad or mad. What just happened was so intense and overwhelming the only thing left to do is cry.
Mr. D was amazing. He really tried to make me cum without using a vibe. He was in full blown Dom mode and was doing things that had me crawling across the bed. There were a few times, maybe several times that I was beyond teetering on the edge but never jumped off.
I'm driving to work this morning thinking about the last few days, especially last night. I had this thought in my head and wondered if it's possible or am I completely nuts. Here's where my brain went....
Just bare with me, I'm going to try and get this out and make as much sense as possible. Is it possible that I did cum and just didn't know it or realize it? There were probably 3 different times that I could hardly keep see straight. They were very specific moments and had me feeling .....I don't know.....different! Good....but different.
Here's how my crazy thoughts came up with this. I am used to having an orgasm with my vibrator. I don't think ever in my life have I had an orgasm just by fucking. Is there a difference when you cum with a vibe as it is when you fuck? I mean, when I cum with the vibe I get this warm wave over my entire body, I get a tingle in my body and then it happens. I want to scream and yell and sometimes my body shakes. But is it different when you cum just by fucking?
Is there a difference between a vaginal orgasm and a clitoral orgasm? Click on the link below to find out!
http://goaskalice.columbia.edu/difference-between-clitoral-and-vaginal-orgasm
How do you know if you have had an orgasm?? Click on the link below to find the answer!
http://goaskalice.columbia.edu/am-i-having-orgasm
If you read the information in the links, which by the way was very interesting, you will see that I'm not completely nuts. I mean, don't get me wrong....I definitely would fit in at a nut house. But this does make me feel better knowing that not everyone can have an orgasm just by fucking!
For obvious reasons, I can be of no help as to what type of orgasms or not-orgasm you did or didn't have.
ReplyDeleteLet me just say that for Tori and I, we relate to the difficulty for her to cum without a vibrator. We have tried a number of times to no avail. It can be very frustrating. We both really want to unlock all her pleasure potential but don't know how. We'll just have to keep at it!
I feel for her. It can be frustrating...but it sure is fun trying!!
DeleteThanks for the comment!
I'm one of those who needs the clit stimulated. When i was younger, i could do the other, but now... it can be frustrating and that doesn't help. At the end of the day getting there is more important than the mechanism.
ReplyDeletethanks for the links. interesting reading.
Thanks DF for the comment. It can be frustrating but you're right....it's about getting there!
DeleteMhh, so I started my sex life way to early in life, and I think that is one reason why I couldn't cum during sex at all for the longest time. Then, years later, I could touch myself while DH fucked me and sometimes that worked. Then, I just started relaxing more about it, I didnt' worry about having an orgasm or not anymore, and just this morning, we had a super quick quickie in which I came about thirty seconds after DH entered me. Just like that. So, I guess what I am saying is, not worrying about it at all really helps! But I know, easier said then done!
ReplyDeleteWOW Julia! 30 seconds? You're right....it IS easier said than done! But I'm working on it!
DeleteLol, now that I have come back to read your reply, I can also tell you that DH actually blogged about our encounter....Its up right now, that was the 30 second one...:D Lucky me!
DeleteI didn't read the links, but I know from experience that vaginal orgasms and clitoral orgasms do feel different. I'm quite fortunate that I can achieve both, usually multiple times. My suggestion to anyone having an issue trying to achieve orgasm would be to try a blindfold. By blocking the sense of sight it allows you to focus more on the sense of touch. Try to relax and concentrate on the physical stimuli. If it doesn't work the first time, don't worry about it, just keep practicing and enjoy.
ReplyDeleteThanks Faerie Wings for commenting!
DeleteI like your idea about the blindfold....hopefully we can try that!
I grew up in the 70's when the sex experts came out with the news that most women need clitoral stimulation in order to orgasm. This was a relief at the time for so many women who thought something was wrong with them. Now, of course, with the new porn showing all these vaginal, g-spot, squirting orgasms (that weren't in older porn), now women once again think something's wrong with them if they don't have vaginal orgasms. But nope. Nothing's wrong. You're in the majority. But apparently, most of that majority don't have sex blogs.
ReplyDeleteI for one, have nothing inside my vagina that could ever lead to an orgasm, and I'm also unlucky in the fact that my clit is far away from there, so there's no incidental stimulation of it during sex, like there is if your opening and clit are closer together.
Thanks for stopping by and commenting. I'm glad to see that I'm not alone in this and that there probably isn't anything wrong with me. But I will say...we are having fun trying!!
DeleteI can't really weigh in here, as a man, but I will say that helping Julia achieve ANY kind of orgasm is the highlight of my life. :) Good post!
ReplyDeleteAww, seeing this here was so unexpected and then reading that. I love you my man. :)
DeleteThank you DH for stopping by and especially commenting. How sweet of you to say that. I think Mr. D enjoys it just as much!!
Deleteoh gosh, for a start everyone is so different! Some women can only cum from/with clit stimulation, some only with something fucking their vagina, some only from oral, some from everything and some not at all!
ReplyDeleteAnd then again, orgasms can be so different - they are different for me depending on how many I've already had, how long I've been denied, what time of the month it is... A ruined orgasm is very different from one with clit stimulation throughout, an orgasm with just fucking and no clit stimulation is very different to one with fucking AND clit stimulation throughout, and I've had energy releases and no orgasm, huge edges that have been more satisfying than orgasms, orgasms that have petered out or stopped just as they started - ruined themselves, if you like!
If you want to come a certain way, what can help is to associate cumming with a cue - so do lots of cumming the way you normally do, and associate it with, for example, a count down from 10 to 1 (orgasming on or after the one). Then when you want to cum in your new certain way - just from fucking for example, or if you're finding it difficult - the extra cue (count down in this case) REALLY helps.
Thank you so much for the comments. I like the trigger idea. I'm going to hand to talk to me. D about that!
DeleteHmmm, I can't orgasm without help from my hand. And I really really don't like vibrators--I find that using them makes it way more difficult for me to cum without them, but that it gets better the longer it's been since I used one. Not sure I made any sense...Guess what I'm trying to spit out is that maybe the less you use a vibrator, the easier it will be to orgasm without it...?
ReplyDeleteHis Subrina,
ReplyDeleteWishing you a Happy New Year!
Mr Fox & Little Kaninchen